I have officially finished the first half of chemo, so exciting! In three weeks time I will start on a new chemo drug, called Paclitaxel. It has most of the same side effects, but less feeling yuck apparently so that's something I'm really looking forward to. Less looking forward to the higher chance of an allergic reaction, but hopefully there will be no problems there!
So far this round of chemo is going well. I have my Mum down to help which is so lovely and makes things so much easier - especially with me not being great at all the pill taking! During the day I think I'm ok-ish, but it's been a lot harder in the evenings and nights this time round with feeling super ick. But it is the last one so oh well! And last night I had my final (fingers crossed) Peg injection, which I hate even more than the harpoon that is Zoladex. So today I have achey legs but at least I can cross one more needle off the list!
(Also just wanted to quickly apologise for the last blog - I didn't mean to upset anyone and that was not my aim! Just needed a wee rant. And wanted to say a big thank you to a beautiful friend from primary school, who messaged me with everything I needed to hear and more. Thanks so so much.)
I haven't been doing as much with my Louie Patooie, but still love spending time with him, even though I'm sure he would much prefer me to just leave him alone to eat eat eat! My friends helped me set up some free jumping for him which was just amazing to watch! This is his first time trying a 1m jump and he just soared over! I love how much he enjoys jumping. Such a little star. I can't wait to go and see him again. Even though he is a wee terror sometimes I just love him so much and miss being out there.
On Friday another lovely friend invited me round to where her horse is and I got a wee ride on him as well which was so nice! He is such a sweetheart and took such good care of me. And was so nice catching up with more pony friends. I'm so thankful to have friends constantly checking in and getting me out doing things and making sure I am still a part of the normal world. I love them all so much! Another wonderful friend did my nails for me last week too, so I have beautiful pretty nails! It was so nice to have this done, and makes me feel a little bit pretty and girly - which is mostly hard when I'm are bald and my lashes and brows are starting to thin!
Another exciting thing happened over the past week, I FINALLY got my full licence! It has taken me about 5000 years it seems. But my lovely partner decided enough was enough and just booked me in. He had the great struggle of trying to teach me in a manual (I'm actually useless and panic at everything with a manual) before getting me my very own elderly wee auto, that was bright yellow with racing stripes. Fondly known as Harold. And very recognisable in town as I still get many photos sent to me of him, even though we parted ways a few years ago. But since the rules have changed and you have to get your full within 5 years of getting your restricted, now was a good time to give it a go! I was so proud of myself :D
I wanted to thank everyone for all the kind and supportive messages after the stuff article came out.
I was mostly really happy with how it came out, and I hope that it might encourage others out there to get to know their boobs - men and women! And I really hope it made a few people aware that Breast Cancer can happen to anyone at any age.
I was a little bit disappointed with the 'mothers day' angle, as I never discussed if I wanted to be a mother with them. I was especially upset with what was written in the Sunday star times, about my 'dreams of motherhood being dashed'. If I am ready to have children one day, then that will be lovely. But that is if and when I decide. And actually, if I do have this 'dream' it is not 'dashed' at all. I was also worried it looked like I am so upset I might not be able to have kids (which isn't true as my chances are fine if I chose to), but didn't choose any of the fertility options, when they just didn't mention the one I chose. I know for so many women going through Breast Cancer it is a huge problem though, especially if they have positive hormone receptors, which can make decisions regarding fertility really hard and really scary. This is just not as much of a problem for the cancer I have. But oh well! I hope it raises more awareness and helps some other people out there :)
I will love you and leave you with a photo of my other beautiful fur babies, Harvey and Tillie, who have been so amazing to have with me through all this!
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